I refuse to be a punching bag

Recently in the news, a heading caught my eye.

http://www.wsoctv.com/videos/news/hickory-man-arrested-and-charged-with-beating-wife/vCH3NG/

“Hickory Man Arrested and Charged with Beating His Wife to Death

HICKORY, N.C. — 

A Hickory man is accused of beating his wife to death, then lying to police about it.

Investigators said Marvin Hill called 911, claiming his wife slipped and fell inside the couple’s home.

Sheriff deputies said when they got to the house, they found signs of a struggle and injuries to the woman’s face. 

Now, Marvin Hill sits in jail, charged murder after he beat her until she died in their home, south of Hickory, deputies said. 

Investigators said when they got to the home, furniture wasoverturned, and it appeared Hill struck his wife with his fist before calling for help, claiming she had fallen.”

As I did more research on this breaking news story, I found that the woman suffered from broken limbs, including both her legs, arms, back and nose. Even when I typed the title of the news story into a search engine, HUNDREDS of news articles about domestic abuse flooded my computer screen. It really just blows my mind how many stories of domestic abuse are still coming to light in newspapers, TV, magazine ads, etc. and still, NO ONE has learned that this is NOT okay, and violence never solves anything, especially when you feel you are unable to control yourself. We hear stories of it, how to prevent it, and what to do if you’re in an abusive relationship, and still, we hear stories of it and make jokes about it. 42% of women have been sexually assaulted by their own partner, and have been injured by it in some way or another, and up to 70% of all female murder victims in the world are killed by their intimate partner. It’s shameful that we still see stories plastered everywhere but yet it’s still almost a weekly occurance in the news that we see yet another woman that is assaulted by her husband or intimate partner. And not to say that men are the only ones to blame, because it is proven that 38% of all domestic assault cases are perpetrated by women. I just cannot fathom why someone would ever want to hurt someone they love to the point of death. When we choose to love somebody, part of what comes with love is wanting to protect and shield them from any danger, and loving unconditionally. Hurting someone to the point of death should be the last thing on your mind. 

This is only furthering the stereotype that men use violence as a means of dominance, and that women are “stupid” or “dumb” for staying with a lover who is an abuser (in this story, we don’t know that there is a history of abuse, but in many cases, there is). Maybe it’s the media’s fault for using violence as a means of entertainment, provoking emotions in some people, such as anger, that are uncontrollable. Maybe it’s the fact that most of society sees women as petite, frail, and “easy”, making us easier targets, knowing that we won’t fight back. Or maybe it’s the age-old argument of nature versus nuture, maybe we learned it through situations of anger or abuse when we were younger, or maybe we are born with the built up anger to hurt. Either way, this is a major societal issue that needs to be solved, human beings are not to be used as punching bags.

http://www.stopvaw.org/prevalence_of_domestic_violence

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5 thoughts on “I refuse to be a punching bag

    • most do, about 80% don’t get reported because usually the victim has a mentality that says “no one needs to know, our issues should be kept inside the home”, but really that is how things like this escalate.

  1. It really is sad to know how much of this goes on and that it has become so common in many peoples lives. I personally know of several members of my own family who have been in threatening situations like this and yet most of them continue to stay in the relationship which I do not understand one bit. You are right being in relationship is being there and protecting one another, hurting a significant other shows no sign of love in anyway. It really disgusts me to know that there are so many people going through these situations.

    • exactly! my view point on this is that the abuser has to have something mentally wrong, whether they know it or not. I think it takes an extreme amount of anger to WANT to hurt someone not only mentally, but phsyically. And its awful that you yourself have family members that you know have gone though things like this, its not and will never be okay.

      • I think that your point is very reasonable. Having something mentally wrong the person seems to be the only logical reason behind it but then that means so many people are suffering mentally from something that causes them to be violent to a loved one. It will never be right in society so its a wonder more measures haven’t been taken to stop this chaos.

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